Satire

MITCH BENN issues some rousing words on the coronavirus fight – and how it has changed our foucs. So, how are we all doing? I do hope that everyone is finding quarantine as unstressful as possible and that the only fever any of you is registering is the figurative ‘cabin’ variety. I myself am actually […]

Recent news reports the world over have been littered with coverage over panic-buying to prepare for self-isolation, with toilet roll high on the list. MITCH BENN sheds light on how the clear-outs start. I’m a big fan of the ‘discount’ supermarket chain Aldi (other Germanic discount supermarket chains are available. Well one other is anyway). […]

MITCH BENN says the right-wing media’s reaction to the prime minister’s announcement is hypocritical. So, our prime minister has announced having conceived a child “out of wedlock”, as our recent ancestors might have tersely put it, while still at least technically married to his last wife (one is given to understand that a divorce has […]

It’s not just turning 50 that has made MITCH BENN want to get in shape. He’s dreams of watching the wheels fall off the Brexit bandwagon. I’ve started going to the gym again. There are a few reasons for this: firstly, I’ve found a local gym which is run by and in aid of a […]

MITCH BENN on the tragic death of television presenter Caroline Flack – and how we all played a part in the media’s involvement. I wasn’t really that aware of Caroline Flack; I realise what a tiresomely bourgeois and pretentious-sounding thing that is to say right now, but it does become relevant, so bear with me. […]

A bridge over the Irish Sea is never going to happen, says MITCH BENN. So what are we being distracted from? Of all the many kinds of lie one hears over the course of one’s life, be they personal, professional or political, perhaps the most depressing lies are the ones that not even the liar […]

MITCH BENN ponders if the UK is willing to sit by and watch the country become Trump’s Britain. Well I don’t know about you but I feel freer already. Seriously though, is it just me or does post-‘Got Brexit Done’ Britain thus far feel a lot like pre-‘Got Brexit Done’ Britain did? As if nothing […]

As MITCH BENN neither celebrates nor commiserates the big moment, he has a special message for Remainers, Brexiteers and our fellow Europeans. So how are you going to spend tonight? I’ll be working, I expect; such is the life of the jobbing comedian. This ‘profession’ is the graveyard of friendships and relationships; our job hours […]

Birthday boy MITCH BENN comes up with a proposal to help take the heat out of our polarised times. There’s always a bit of a balancing act to being a columnist; on the one hand you’ve been engaged by the publication you’re writing for to provide your own personal ‘take’ on things and it’s to […]

MITCH BENN says that immigration is not the drain on the NHS that some claim it to be – but, in fact, a vital part of it. Before I begin, a quick heads-up: at about the 200-word mark of this column I’m going to say something which, at first glance, might look a bit racist. […]

The only thing that hasn’t changed since the election is Boris Johnson, argues MITCH BENN. So how do Remain regroup and go forward? As you may recall, I left last week’s column on a cliffhanger, saying I’d been thinking about things we – as in the Remain movement – could still do in this new […]

MITCH BENN will continue to be a ‘sore loser’ in 2020 because his views on Brexit have not changed – regardless of the general election result. Okay, so that sucked. Not Christmas; I should point that out. I can’t speak for anyone else but I had a good Christmas, indeed, judging by the fact I […]

After a dramatic 12 months, here is STEVE ANGLESEY’S lowdown of the losers who ended up winning. 20 CHARLOTTE GILL A Brexiteer journalist for the Sun, Telegraph and Mail on Sunday, Gill appeared to call for the end of satire after the general election, tweeting “I can’t believe Have I Got News For You is […]

The general election is a big important part of the battle for the Remain movement – but the war won’t be over on Friday morning. I know the home stretch going into an election is supposed to be all about clarity and unity of purpose, and the last thing you want to be presented with […]

Seizing an opportunity to defeat Boris Johnson could instigate a new era of political free-thinking, according to Mitch Benn. Boris Johnson is a liar and a coward. Once more for the people in the back row: BORIS JOHNSON IS A LIAR AND A COWARD. Now, in previous eras this might have been thought sufficient reason […]

MITCH BENN on doing everything he can to make sure politicians don’t ruin his Christmas without a fight. I’m breaking one of my own cardinal rules this year. Generally I operate an absolute embargo on anything Christmas-related until December 1. Obviously one can’t entirely avoid any mention of Christmas during November, or indeed October (or, […]

Sci-fi fan MITCH BENN on what his hero Douglas Adams would have to say about politics today Whoever came up with the expression “You must never meet your heroes; they’ll always disappoint you” had dreadful taste in heroes. I’ve been lucky enough to meet quite a few of my heroes over the years and by […]

With Donald Trump and Boris Johnson up for election, MITCH BENN looks at just how untouchable they are The word ‘mistake’ has two principal uses, related but definitely distinct. It can mean an involuntary error, a slip-up, a blooper, a typo… something you didn’t want to do or intend to do, but did anyway through […]

MITCH BENN on why there are no safe seats in this election and uses Richmond Park to defend tactical voting. It’s utterly absurd that while I’ve been writing this column for a little over three years now, not only is this the second general election I’ve had to cover in that time, but that previous […]

The welfare of the country should not be forgotten amid Brexit, writes MITCH BENN. Before I became active in the Remain campaign I was active for many years in the sceptical (and indeed Skeptical) community, which is a rather self-congratulatory way of saying that before I started wasting precious hours out of every day getting […]

Every day we’re still in the EU is a solid win for Remain, says Mitch Benn First of all, a little essential housekeeping: You might recall that I ended last week’s column by issuing a plea for help. I bewailed my enforced absence from last Saturday’s march and asked if you could help me make […]

MITCH BENN challenges you to make up for his absence at the People’s Vote march. My committed activism in the Remain cause since the 2016 referendum is fuelled in no small part by residual guilt at the knowledge that I didn’t do a damn thing to help or promote the Remain cause before the 2016 […]

James Cleverly’s much-mocked graph gives a revealing insight into the mindset of panicky Brexiteers says MITCH BENN. James Cleverly’s explanation for why Brexit must be done by October 31st. Photograph: Twitter. – Credit: Archant The phrase “There are lies, damned lies and statistics” is selectively trotted out by whoever wants to dismiss whichever set of […]

The toxic twins are being met with increasingly defiant opposition – and it’s working, says MITCH BENN. Last week, I took to Twitter to express what is, these days, an unusual statement to be heard coming from the likes of me; I said I was proud of Britain. My specific point was this: just now, […]

Labour’s message on Brexit is fooling no-one says MITCH BENN. And so, we pass the autumn equinox and soldier on into the last bit of the year. There are two things which happen around this time of year with a maddening predictability: firstly, Christmas stuff will start to turn up in the shops despite it […]

MITCH BENN asks why the PM would compare himself to the Hulk – a personification of uncontrolled anger, fury, and whose alter ego is desperate to escape. It doesn’t seem to take much these days to get me feeling old. Mind you, that’s been the case since I was about 24; sometimes I wish I […]

MITCH BENN on Boris Johnson becoming the first prime minister since 1894 to lose his first commons vote and also reducing his from +1 to -43 in a week. So this time last week, you may or may not recall, I was bewailing the near-impossibility of submitting a regular current events-based (and specifically Brexit-related current […]

As a comedian, MITCH BENN knows how it feels to stand before a crowd that’s booing you. Here’s when it happened to Prime Minister. Of all the disparate elements in the jumble of intermittently remunerative hobbies which in my case passes for a ‘career’, writing this column is one of the most rewarding (and indeed […]

The Edinburgh Fringe is over for another year and Mitch Benn says it’s been a good one. So the Edinburgh Fringe is over for another year; I’m not going to start bandying figures about but suffice to say I’ve had a really good one, both in terms of audience numbers and response. This is gratifying […]

Even the legendary patience of the Scots is being exhausted as the country is dragged out of the EU against its will, says Mitch Benn. I’ve returned to my adopted hometown of Edinburgh to partake in the annual month-long ritual of comedy industry chiselling which is the Festival Fringe (my show is called Ten Songs […]

US politics tends to be a more colourful and kinetic affair than our own variety, although of course there are always parallels to be drawn says MITCH BENN. Prime Minister Boris Johnson with Home Secretary Priti Patel attending the first meeting of the National Policing Board at the Home Office in London. Picture: Kirsty Wigglewsorth/PA […]

Comedian and host of People’s Vote campaign rallies, MITCH BENN calls on remainers to reclaim the flag in the name of true patriotism. There’s just over a week to go before I head up to Edinburgh to perform my show Ten Songs To Save The World at the Festival Fringe (Underbelly, 3.45pm, in case you […]