The national strike you might have missed

Wondered why you’ve seen nobody on the streets for two days and the shops are all closed? It’s because it’s the week of the Great British National Strike, of course!

In the event it’s passed you by, the Great British National Strike, which began yesterday and runs until February 9, is a “peaceful, grassroots movement to defend our freedoms and protect our communities”. Organised by Richard Donaldson, a former soldier from Cheshire, it aims to bring the country to a standstill in protest against immigration, Net Zero targets and the Labour government.

And it’s certainly going well! On the Strike’s Facebook page just today, Donaldson was boasting how he had received “over 50 emails and messages from people taking part in The Great British National Strike with screenshots of their workplaces and schools who are seeing the ‘highest level of absences’. Word will rapidly spread this week.”

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If the progress continues at this rate – and presuming the UK population does not change in the interim – it will only take another 2,732,000 days, or just under 7,485 years, for the whole of the UK to be out on the streets!

“We’re off,” said a supporter, Clive Bee. “Freezer full, cars fuelled, flags up, certainly don’t need to go anywhere for a week. Jobs at home.” Meanwhile, another striker, Lindsey Porter, helpfully added: “I’m retired but I’m with you all the way.”

Donaldson claims that tackling immigration is not “anywhere near as complicated as politicians pretend” and proposed placing all foreign nationals on “terrorism watchlists”.

“If i wasn’t half way though buying a house id [sic] be joining you,” writes Daniel Holland on Facebook, while “With you all the way Richard,” writes another supporter, Sue Salti. “Let’s see how starmer reacts to this.” The PM, one assumes, has bigger worries right now than 50 quite possibly already unemployed people sitting on the sofa watching Loose Women.