I am an optimist in most things, especially when it comes to romance, but the rising cost of everything – including meeting potential partners – is enough to test that positive outlook. What it means is that being single in 2026 feels like some kind of punishment.
I don’t like to waste time and money – but when did dating become more of a financial burden than an emotional one? Because that’s how it feels to me now, here, in my 30s. The data backs it up – new figures from Hargreaves Lansdown show that, on average, a single person spends an additional £1,759 annually on life’s essentials.
I’d describe myself as a budget-conscious individual, though my Uber Eats account may suggest otherwise. But what the figure above doesn’t include is the cost of trying to build a connection with someone else. Dating is expensive, and comes with no guarantee of any return and with worse odds than a scratchcard.
Then there are the presentational measures that women face as entry-level requirements for dating, such as perfect hair, skin, nails, and clothes, which are not luxuries but invisible costs that all form part of the dating tax.
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I’m not bothered if a man filters me based on whether I have had a fresh manicure, but the level of expectation puts pressure on women in the dating game to spend money. Slowly, the idea of affordable romance gets further out of reach. Perhaps it never existed.
Another problem in all this is that the dating apps most people use today are absolutely dire. One of the things I’ve learned about wine is that, when choosing a bottle, you often have to look beyond the label. When it comes to dating, it’s hard to differentiate because so many of the profiles look so similar.
The dating app system rewards conformity rather than any real effort to make a connection. This is why it’s financially smart to be selective about the dates you go on. Not only that, but you know that the people you meet are already distracted by the idea that someone better is just one swipe away.
So instead of falling into some inflation trap by going on more dates, I choose to save my precious pennies – and then splash them on a bottle of 19 Crimes Cabernet Sauvignon with my friends; affordable and without the promise of a bitter aftertaste.
It’s not just dating where the single person gets hit in the wallet. We must be canny with our shopping choices, as single people often miss out on all those multi-buy offers. We’re just shopping for one. While you can get round this with meticulous planning and by filling up the freezer, it’s the standard living expenses, from housing to energy and water consumption, that really get you.
Even with the 25% single person discount on council tax, you still have to cover all the bills, knowing full well that couples are getting it much easier. It’s no wonder some people are incentivised to remain in unhappy or even dangerous relationships. Living on your own can be financially uncomfortable, unless you have a six-figure salary or a side hustle of selling cute feet pics on OnlyFans.
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The singles tax is not within our control, but I cannot help but feel my soul sink into my socks whenever I start to ponder what will happen to me next year. Will I ever be able to afford to buy a home? As I say, I’m an optimist, but I’m also not insane.
Romance, we’re told, is about connection, but increasingly it’s becoming about whether you are willing, or able, to spend enough money in order to find it. When you’re plagued with questions about your future, as I am, then you can feel your life starting to become less about chance and more about control. Luckily for me, I’m a glass-half-full person and have faith that better days will come. They have to.
Sophie Smyth is head of audience at The New World
